An Irishman walks into a bar in Toronto and orders a drink. The bartender, noticing his accent, asks him “What brings you to Canada?
“The Irishman says “Well, I was in a pub in Dublin and the coaster under my glass said, ‘Drink Canada Dry’, so I thought I’d give it a shot”
Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. Paddy says to Murphy “I’m gonna have the day off. I’m gonna pretend I’m mad! ”He climbs up the rafters.
Hangs upside down and shouts “I’M A LIGHT BULB! I’M A LIGHT BULB! ”Murphy watches in amazement! The Foreman shouts “Paddy you’re mad, go home”. So he leaves the site. Murphy starts packing his kit up to leave as well. “Where the hell are you going?” asks the Foreman. “I can’t work in the friggin’ dark!” says Murphy.
Shocking Exclusion, In a surprising turn of events, a teenage girl discovered she was excluded from her father and stepmother’s wedding. The couple decided on a child-free event, extending the restriction to those under 18, which included the girl. Hurtful Revelation, The revelation came just weeks before the wedding, leaving the girl devastated, especially considering her close relationship with her father. Despite her 18th birthday being two days after the ceremony, she found herself barred from attending.
Birthday Celebration Ignites Controversy, On her 18th birthday, the girl, feeling mature and confident, celebrated on social media. This triggered a wave of reactions from friends and family, prompting criticism towards her dad and stepmom’s decision. Backlash and Accusations, The backlash led to heated exchanges, with the girl being called immature and selfish by her dad and stepmom.
They justified their exclusion, arguing that her actions validated their decision. Seeking Validation on Reddit, Conflicted and seeking perspective, the girl turned to Reddit’s AITA community, asking for opinions on whether her public expression of feelings and birthday celebration were justified despite being excluded from her father’s wedding.
To hide his affair, Herman inflicts emotional distress upon his stepson. When his jilted wife, the boy’s mother, learns the truth, she calmly delivers justice. The soft melodies of Billie Holiday filled the room, the sultry voice surrounding the entangled figures on the white sofa. Herman, in his thirties, and Jezebel, his mistress, shared stolen moments in the dimly lit living room. “This is so naughty of us!” Jezebel whispered. “What if your wife comes home early? “My wife hasn’t come home early in at least a year! We have the whole morning,” Herman insisted.
“The whole morning!” Jezebel echoed. “Well, in that case, best we make the most of it, Mr. Loverman. Kiss me like you mean it. “That’s not all I’m going to do; just wait,” Herman replied, tossing his sweater aside. They lost themselves in the moment, but a creaking door interrupted them. Panic gripped the pair; Herman’s wife wasn’t supposed to be back for hours. “Who is it?” Jezebel whispered. “It can’t be my wife,” Herman pleaded. “She told me she was working late. Quick, get—” The front door slammed shut, and Herman faced the music. A young voice broke the tension. “Herman? Are you here?” Herman’s son, Jake, entered, backpack slung over his shoulders.
“What are you doing home, Jake?” Herman asked angrily. “They made us go home early because of a scare,” Jake explained. “They thought there was someone with a gun in the school. Herman, who is this lady?” Jake asked, looking at Jezebel. Herman denied Jezebel’s presence. “Jake, you must be seeing things. “But I see a lady right there,” Jake insisted. Herman concocted a lie about Jake’s shock from the school scare. “Close your eyes and count to ten. If you can’t see the ghost, it can’t see you. And you see, it’ll disappear if you do that. ”Jezebel disappeared into the bedroom as Jake obediently counted. When he opened his eyes, the woman was gone. “I made her disappear?” Jake exclaimed. “You got rid of the ghost. You’re a brave young man,” Herman assured. After coaxing Jake to keep the encounter a secret, Herman allowed him unlimited screen time. After Jake left, Jezebel re-entered the room, disapproving of Herman’s actions.
“What was that? You lied to your son? “Stepson,” Herman corrected. “What did you expect? Tell him about us? Admit to our affair? I’ll do whatever it takes to keep us together. ”Jezebel sighed. “Okay, cool,” she said. “That was close, though,” Herman said. “We’ll get back to what we were doing another time! “Yeah,” she agreed, kissing him goodbye. “See you later, Loverman,” she added seductively. Herman’s wife, Grace, returned home after sunset. Tension enveloped the dinner table as they sat down to eat. Jake seized the opportunity to share his peculiar day. “Mom,” he began, “we left school early today because they thought there was someone with a gun inside. “What…what happened?” Grace gasped. “It was a false alarm. Everything’s fine, right, Jake?” Herman interjected. “I’m fine,” Jake said. “But when I came home, I saw a ghost.” “A ghost?” Grace asked, concerned. “It’s just his imagination,” Herman intervened, concealing his panic. “Post-traumatic stress from the school scare.”
An 85 years old lady was waiting for her husband at the bar in Harpoon Harry’s. Suddenly, a very handsome man enters and sits down a few seats away. The man is so attractive, she cannot keep her eyes off him. After a short time,the man notices her staring and approaches her.
Before the lady has time to apologize, the man looks deep into her eyes and says in a sulty tone, “I’ll do anything you’d like. Anything you can imagine in your wildest dreams. I doesn’t matter how extreme or unusual it is, I will do it, matter how extreme or unusual it is, I will do it, for this i want $100 cash. And there’s another condition. “Completely stunned by this turn of events, the lady asks him what the condition is. You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.” The man said. The lady takes a moment to consider the offer from the handsome man, she reaches into her handbag and puts $100 in his hands. She then smiles, looks him square in the eyes and slowly but clearly says,” paint my house”.
A farmer drove to a neighbor’s farmhouse and knocked at the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. “Is your dad or mom home?” said the farmer. “No, they went to town.” “How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?” “No, he went with Mom and Dad.
The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, mumbling to himself, when the young boy says, “I know where all the tools are, if you want to borrow one, or I can give Dad a message. “Well, said the farmer uncomfortably. “No, I really want to talk to your Dd, about your brother Howard getting my daughter Suzy pregnant”. The boy thought for a moment, then says, “You’ll have to talk to my Dad about that. I know he charges $500 for the bulls and $150 for the pigs, but I have no idea how much he charges for Howard.”
I’m a 48-year-old man and my 19-year-old daughter has always been an independent thinker. I raised her to be independent and think for herself, which I’ve always appreciated. However, we recently hit a bit of a snag. She got engaged and decided that she doesn’t want me to walk her down the aisle at her wedding. She argues that her mother and I don’t “own” her, therefore we have no right to “give her away”. I feel hurt by this because we never treated her like an object or piece of property, rather we’ve tried our best to provide her with a wonderful life. Her stance seems extreme to me and despite discussions, she’s refusing to budge on the issue. I respect her choices, but I feel she’s disregarding our feelings completely. As a response, I told her that if she feels that way, then I won’t be paying for her wedding.
I don’t want to come across as controlling or manipulative. It’s true, I don’t “own” her, I also don’t owe her a fully-funded wedding. She can pay for her own wedding if she’s insistent on this stance. I’m feeling quite conflicted about this. AITA? Edit: So, this isn’t about making the wedding about me. Walking her down the aisle (while all eyes are on her anyway) and then sitting down is hardly making the wedding about me. It’s about her attitude. She’s had every opportunity in life so far, and to exclude us from this day is a spit in the face.
It’s a rejection of everything we’ve done for her, sacrificed for her, given her. It’s selfish. “90% of wedding traditions and symbolism had roots in things we don’t acknowledge today. Should we stop all of them? The rings, the flowers, the dress, the wedding party, the cake, the flower girls… a father walking his daughter down the aisle has been about respect, pride, love and honoring the father/daughter relationship for far longer than it was about ownership. “Independent thinking does not mean rude or selfish thinking. Being an independent thinker does not give someone the license to disregard or disrespect the thoughts, feelings, or perspectives of others. Independent thinking is about maintaining the ability to think critically and form one’s own opinions while remaining respectful and considerate of others. It is a balance between asserting individuality and engaging in meaningful and respectful interactions with others.
It’s wonderful to celebrate the beginning of a new life with a loved one by attending their wedding. The guests of USMC Sgt. Joshua Newville and Senior Airman Emily Leehan’s wedding were expecting a good time, and they got it, but they also saw one of the most unforgettable scenes in history. Leehan had also written vows for her stepson Gage, which she began reading aloud. The adorable little child couldn’t contain his excitement at seeing his father’s wedding, and it was clear that he not only accepted his future mother, but was ecstatic about his dad’s choice.
Leehan, seeing Gage’s wide eyes on her, turned to him and began reading their wedding vows. Everyone in the room went “awww” at the end of her speech since it was so heartfelt. Everyone was crying with happiness, but it was Gage’s adorable reaction that everyone was talking about. He sobbed uncontrollably as he clung to his stepmother and listened to her remarks. “I want you to be safe, and to try your hardest and to be a good person,” Leehan said. She then said, “Don’t cry baby,” because she noticed that the emotional moment was too much for that child to bear.
“The last thing thing I hope you learn is that you are a special boy,” Leehan went on to say. “You are so extremely smart, handsome, and kind to others. You have helped shape me into the woman that I am today and I may not have given you the gift of life, but life surely gave me the gift of you. ”After taking a moment to compose themselves, the pair said their vows. It was stated that the newlyweds returned to work straight after the ceremony. They were both required to report back to Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst, so the honeymoon had to be put on hold.
However, things changed when she talked to her mother about the money. Hearing her mother’s unfavorable response, she had to take the legal route and file a case against her. The girl shared that she had a complicated relationship with her parents, which had worsened as she grew up. Inheriting money from her grandfather further exacerbated her relationship with her mother. She explained, “When I tried to get the money transferred to my college savings, I encountered a problem. My mother. ”She wanted the money to study in her dream college, but her mother had other things in mind. She expected OP (Original Poster) to pay back whatever money she had spent on her through the years.
Thus, when OP asked her mother to transfer the inheritance money to her account, she refused. She said the money belonged to her because of all she had done for her daughter. At first, her mother was confused, but she started yelling when OP revealed the total. OP confessed that her mother had always stolen money from her room. She had broken her safe and would cash in the funds OP would win by participating in different sports competitions. Feeling helpless, OP waited a few days before talking to her mother again. Meanwhile, she calculated how much money her mother owed her. As to how she did this, she revealed: “When I was 13 I had decided to start keeping a notebook of all of the money I had earned.
”After adding all the money, OP realized her mother had stolen almost 125,000 from her in the past. She owed OP 250,000, including the money OP inherited from her grandfather. Armed with her evidence, OP marched into her mother’s room to tell her about the money she owed. At first, her mother was confused, but she started yelling when OP revealed the total. She explained: “She started yelling that all of that was hers, since she had spent more than that on my medical bills. ”The girl remained patient and asked her mother why she wasn’t doing this with her siblings. Her mother replied that OP was responsible for paying her back because she was the eldest child. Before talking to her mother, OP had copied everything into a file on her computer because she knew how her mother would react. She recalled: “When she took my notebook and papers to destroy, I just added on what the notebook, folder, and papers had cost to the total. ”The following day, OP sent an email to her mother, asking her to pay or she would take the legal route. She threatened to sue her for the money she had stolen from her. However, after thinking about her email again, she felt she had gone overboard. She wrote a Reddit post, asking other users if she had done the right thing. Kris82868 assured OP she was not at fault. “Paying for the medical needs of a 4 year old kid is what a parent is supposed to do and a duty,” she explained. OP confessed that she was raised to believe children had to repay their parents once they became adults. She felt she couldn’t repay them later in life because of the ongoing issues. Meanwhile, another Redditor confessed that she would open another account in her name to separate her money from her mother if she was in OP’s place. SunnyBunnyHopHop alsosuggested:“You need to have an attorney review all the information & discuss your available options. ”In OP’s updated post, she revealed her father was helping her get the money back. She had opened a separate bank account and got rid of those with her mother’s name. She also shared that her mother confessed her other siblings did not belong to her father. Her mother had cheated on her husband and had five children out of her affair. “So now, she is dealing with a law suit, potential criminal charges, and a divorce,” she revealed. OP thanked everyone for their suggestions and hoped her father would get full custody of his children. She admitted that discussing her problem with other Redditors was very helpful.
A blissful engagement quickly became a nightmare for a woman when her fiancé’s family made an outrageous request that left her rethinking their relationship. A woman loved her fiancé dearly. She thought they were the perfect match – she believed she didn’t want to spend her life with anybody else. “My fiancé proposed to me about 8 months ago. We decided on having a relatively small wedding which is in two days. Everything was going great. He seems absolutely perfect, and we are very much in love,” the woman shared. Only two days before their special day, her fiancé approached her with such an outrageous request: that his dad check her hymen in front of his brothers and uncles to see if she was still a virgin. The request sounded absurd to the woman, so she laughed it off. However, she was shocked when her fiancé insisted he was dead serious. He then explained that in his family, the father checks a bride’s virginity the night before the wedding to see if she is still “pure.
”Utterly uncomfortable with the request, the woman said she wasn’t sure she would do that. The man insisted she go through it, assuring her that even his mom had to. “He said it would prove how much I love him,” she revealed. He also gaslit her saying she had nothing to hide if she was indeed a virgin. The woman was in disbelief. She decided to leave, leaving her groom-to-be in tears. “It was very dramatic,” she commented. Part of the woman wanted to call off the wedding right then and there, but she loved the man and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. She began considering the strange ceremony, all for the sake of being welcomed into the family. She took shelter at a friend’s place while she tried to decide what to do.
The following morning, she went to meet her fiancé to tell him she would not allow the males of his family to examine her, and he needed to respect her decision. The man insisted he needed to go through with it for their wedding to push through. He then accused her of lying about her virginity, given she didn’t want to undergo the ceremony. The entire time, the woman stayed calm and rational about the situation. However, the man started getting aggressive, and the more she tried to explain herself, the angrier he got. “I told him if he really loved me, he would stand by me on this and tell his father no,” the woman shared. She hoped he’d come around and agree, but she was stunned by his reaction. Instead of getting his support, the woman got slapped for saying this. He told his fiancée that he didn’t need to prove anything. Heartbroken, the woman realized this was not the perfect man she once fell in love with. He turned out to be a completely different person, so she decided to call off their wedding. The situation left the woman miserable. She lived with her friend and allowed herself to feel all her emotions before moving on and getting back up on her feet.